By Meryl Gottlieb| firstname.lastname@example.org| @buzzlightmeryl
How I Met Your Mother airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on CBS
How I Met Your Mother is back after a two-week hiatus and fixed the tiny slump it had after the last episode failed to impress. I’m still not over how weird it was that Robin (Cobie Smulders) floated away. It gives me the heebee-jeebees.
Barney (Neil Patrick Harris) got very drunk indeed and now has a killer hangover he can’t even awaken from. Oh but don’t worry it’s only 10 hours until the wedding!! That’s right. It’s wedding day, 8 a.m. and our beloved groom is out cold.
He needs the Stinson Hangover Fixer Elixir — from FDR’s “Too Many Manhattans Project,” a play on the real Manhattan Project — the magic potion Barney always gave to the gang when they had wicked hangovers. However, Barney is the only one who knows the secret ingredient, which is mixed with Tantrum (I wonder what our world would be like if this drink were real), Funyuns and grease. I’m confused as to how this would help a hangover instead of making it a lot worse. Nevertheless, the gang is set on figuring out how to make the elixir so Barney can be ready in time for wedding photos.
Now, a true HIMYM fan will ask why it matters if Barney is conscious for the photos because everyone knows his superpower is that he cannot take a bad picture, right? Wrong. He is actually drunk enough to take a “bad” photo. It’s in quotes because does Neil Patrick Harris ever really look bad? I didn’t think so.
Seeing Barney in this terrible state prompted the gang to vow to never get that drunk again. Of course then Bob Saget narrates the stories on how everyone broke that vow.
Marshall (Jason Segel) promised he would never get that drunk again as long as he had a full head of hair. In 2020, he has a terrible combover and is likely to lose the race for a position on the New York Supreme Court as the polls are coming in. Four hours later, it’s found he actually won the race and now has to give an acceptance speech drunk. I really hope he tries to implement Batman in some way; New York would be a better place if it had a little more Batman.
I really loved this flash forward. We get to see what happens to Marshall and Lily, but how unfortunate is it that in six years Marshall is going to lose his hair like that?!
Lily (Alyson Hannigan) cracks after she takes Marvin to Wesleyan University for his first day in college in 2030. As soon as they leave him, Marshall and Lily head to the bar, only to find that Marvin had the same plans. This wasn’t as funny as the other flash forwards, but I will never forgo an opportunity for Lily to say, “You son of a me.”
Robin’s vow only lasts two years, for she wakes up with Barney in Argentina in 2016. The two can’t remember a thing but seem to act normal when they hear the BABY cry. Yes, BABY. I freaked. However, I had to take a chill pill because it’s not their baby. They were just too drunk to realize where they were. I got so enthused that we would see that future for Barney and Robin, only to find it ripped from my fingertips.
I cannot take the anticipation to see whether or not Barney and Robin will actually say, “I do.” Their future is so uncertain, and it’s killing me. I don’t want to rush to the finale because I’m going to be a wreck when it comes, but I need to find out what happens soon.
Ted and Marshall collected the known ingredients and only had grease left to get. Unfortunately, the Farhampton Inn’s kitchen is all-organic and the only grease would be from the bacon they made for breakfast. The chef refuses to make more unless all the bacon he just made goes in 10 minutes. Challenge accepted — though not from Marshall as one may expect. It is our lovelorn hero Ted who steps up to the plate, literally, after figuring out his mother had been lying to him about his bacon allergy just so he would eat healthy. Can you imagine a world without bacon? That’s one sad life. After one bite, Ted is addicted. But how much bacon can one person eat in one sitting? My answer may be different than the rest of humanity’s so I’m going to go with not an infinite amount. Right? I mean, who would eat that much bacon? I wouldn’t. That’s crazy. Anyway, Ted becomes sick shortly after. And that, kids, is the first and last time he ever ate bacon.
Now, can you just imagine hearing similar words, but about the Mother, in a month? Folks, I really don’t want the show to go.
While Ted and Marshall have their project, Robin and Lily try to wake Barney up to get the last ingredient. Throwing him down the stairs, putting his face in a bucket of cold water and threatening to cut his tie didn’t work, so naturally the only thing left to do is to kiss. It’s Lily’s dream come true! I never thought we’d see this day. I have always loved Lily’s unsubtle, unrequited sexual advances toward Robin; Hannigan has always played them so perfectly.
Barney does wake up after their kiss and reveals the elixir is really just a lie — it’s a “place-bro” — but he only lied because he loves them all. Every time he gave one of them a glass of the elixir, it was at one of their worst moments. Marshall thought he failed the bar exam, Robin was afraid to go back on-air, Ted was just left at the altar and Lily had a kindergarten field trip — wow, really drastic in comparison to everyone else’s worst moments. Barney loves his friends, and I love him. No, this is not a joke about the purple dinosaur; I have real feelings for these characters! Don’t judge!
Tonight’s episode was simply great for comedy. The gang’s chemistry was as flawless as ever and the story was quite funny. It’s always great for the show when they mix in a lot of time elements and have the cast interacting as much as they did.
You probably think I forgot to mention when Ted (Josh Radnor) broke his vow, but I had to save the best for last, and the best scenes always include the Mother (Cristin Milioti). It’s New Year’s Eve/ Day 2022 and the adorable couple is traveling to a party to celebrate the Mother’s book, which Ted thinks will change the world. (This is something I’d like more information on, please!) They both have a bit too much champagne, and Ted makes the Stinson Hangover Fixer Elixir for the Mother in the morning to boost her spirits. She’s only able to have a sip of it before their two kids run in to say good morning.
Every little glimpse into their life brings tears of joy to my eyes. Each scene with Ted and the Mother is like a little piece of the puzzle we’ve been trying to put together for nine years. Thirty seconds can be so rewarding and so well received. I want more of them. I want to see their happiness forever.
The last clip of the episode shows how the roles of unwanted sexual advances have been switched. Robin is now the one who wants to kiss Lily more while Lily is fine with it being a one-time thing. I just love this gag.
How much do you love bacon? What’s your magical way to cure a hangover? Let me know @buzzlightmeryl